Focus Daniel-san

If you're from Generation X, you know this clip.  Millennials, you've probably saw this a bunch, too, growing up.  Mr. Miyagi doesn't actually say, "Focus, Daniel-san," but that's how most of us remember it.  This past week was a time for me to find focus.

After almost six months living on the streets since I landed here in Richmond, a friend from the BMX days loaned me enough to get a room for a week.  Many of you reading this would balk at the thought of spending seven nights in a low budget, weekly motel, but for me it felt luxurious.  Seven nights sleeping in a real bed, which was actually really comfortable, able to sleep when I felt like it and get up when I felt like it.  Being warm for seven days straight was epic.  Being able to take a shower when I felt like it.   24/7 wifi.  A microwave.  These things most all of you take for granted, are amazing when, like me, you've been without them for a long period.  But most of all, I slept knowing I would actually be alive the next morning (barring an alien invasion, zombie apocalypse, or well placed meteor).  That's one thing I haven't experienced for seven days in a row, for well over a year. 

I had a whole bunch of drawing, writing, and blogging I wanted to get done.  But I quickly realized just how exhausted and physically beat down I was from the time on the streets.  So I didn't get near as much done as I wanted to, especially the first 2 or 3 days.  The one thing I did get accomplished was to step back from the stress of day to day survival, and figure out where I need to focus for the coming months.  It may not sound like much, but it's huge in my situation.  Homelessness has many different levels, and micro levels, which most people don't realize.  I landed here in a completely strange city, with $3 in my pocket, six months ago, with a back pack and shoulder bag, with a few clothes and art supplies, not knowing a single person. 

Survival on the streets starts at the hourly level.  Where can I go to the bathroom?  Where can I sit?  Where can I sleep?  What's the best way to scrounge up money to eat?  Where can I get out of the rain?  Where can I sleep?  Will I get jumped in this part of town? 

It started with one question after another, minute by minute, hour after hour.  I wasn't even looking to the next day, except for the weather.  To survive homelessness, I've learned to try to stabilize one little aspect at a time.  Humans are creatures of habit, and when you are suddenly in a situation where you don't have any habits, because every basic necessity needs to be met, every question "normal" people never think about, needs to be answered.  Weather, also, becomes critically important immediately.  When I got here it was about staying cool and trying to keep hydrated in 90-95 degree (F) heat.  Then came rain, wind, lightning, cold, cold rain, and I even spent 17 1/2 hours outside in a snowstorm that dumped 11 inches.  It has, by no means, been easy.

My life has been six months of struggling to meet one basic need, get it somewhat stable, and then immediately move on to another.  When you're homeless, questions like, "Should I buy a $1 McChicken sandwich and a drink for lunch?  Or should I buy new trash bags, and spend $4, to keep all my stuff dry?  The trash bags won and I skipped a meal.  Obscure things take on near life or death importance. 

On top of that, my best chance at getting back to making a living is writing and art, which the majority of people (who don't realize Etsy, Shopify, and similar things exist) think is completely stupid.  If I could actually get a job that paid enough to get me back on my feet, I would have, long ago.  Yet I managed to sell some drawings, find a little work, and scrape by.  But taking a step back to really set a direction and make some goals, beyond surviving another night, just wasn't possible until now. 

So that, along with just resting and healing my body and mind, were the thing I accomplished this last week.  I thought long and hard about what makes sense and will help me build a viable business with my art, blogging, and writing.  Yes, I put blogging and writing in two different categories, blogging is a very specific type of writing, and I need to spend more time doing other types, but keep blogging as well. 

So here's what's coming, providing I manage to survive the cold nights and sketchy weather ahead, which is definitely not a sure thing.  I'm going to stop doing so many original drawings of rock stars, and selling the originals.  I have three drawings lined up, now and in the near future, after that my original 18" X 24" drawings will cost $350.  That's actually just above minimum wage for the time I put into them, but they're worth it at this point. 

I'm going to do more smaller drawings, from 8 1/2" X 11" to 11" X 17", and sell copies and high quality prints when I can.  I'm going to do more BMX drawings soon.  Several people have asked about those. 

I'm going to get the zines you guys have already ordered shipped as soon as I can.  I'm really sorry about the delay.  Since my sleeping bag and blankets got stolen (trashed, confiscated, whatever term you want to use), I have to use money to buy new ones right now, that I'd rather use to ship your zines out.  They WILL get to all of you who've ordered them.  I will do more big, fat zines in the Freestyle BMX Tales series, as well, maybe one every 2 or 3 months. 

I just started a new writing project, basically my first novel, which will be published as a blog, free to everyone.  It will have some BMX stuff in it, but is largely a vehicle to express the worldview I've come to, which was influenced by things like BMX and skating, but also by the hundreds of books I've read, and insights I've had along the way. We're in a really crazy era in human history, not just right now, but our whole lives.  I have a lot of ideas on where society is headed, and why things are so chaotic.  This fiction story will attempt to get those ideas across without being completely boring. 

So that's the general plan.  I've got a ton of ideas.  I've put many of them on the back burner in order to focus on what I've realized is most important in my week of taking a step back looking at the bigger picture.  Thanks for reading, and I'll do my best to keep putting pretty cool stuff out into the world.