Saturday, July 29, 2023

So... Chase Hawk built a little backyard ramp...


Yeah, I was being a bit sarcastic in the title.  Chase Hawk got some property, moved himself, the wife, and the kid out to it, and then built his dream ramp.  Way to go.  No matter how far our lives may have diverged from the BMX world, if you spent some serious time riding back in the day, something like this was the dream.  Props to Chase for pulling it off.  

After the intro part about the dream, and building this crazy bikepark in his yard, Chase proceeds to completely tear the place up.  Transfers and variations every which way possible, and then some.  Just watch the video.  then watch it again.  

What this really reminds me of was a time when I worked at Unreel Productions (Vision).  As cameraman in either 1988 or 1989, I got the great job of driving a van load of skaters out to the Blockhead Ramp, somewhere out in the SoCal boonies, south of Orange County.  That was the first really cool, privately owned ramp set up I ever saw, with bowl corners and all.  I think every one of us there was thinking, "I want this in my backyard some day."  That day sticks out in my mind, and this video of Chase really reminds me of that.  I didn't have a bike to ride, mostly because it was a skaters only spot.  But I got to hang out and shoot video, and get paid for it, which was a great day in my book, back then.  

The other thing that stands out in my mind about that day is that this guy.  He was 14 or 15 then, I think, and he was one of the skaters I drove out there.  That's the first time I met him.  You never know who those young BMXer and skater kids will turn out to be. when you first meet them.  To bring this post full circle, I only met Chase once, when I gave him a ride in my taxi one night, with a couple of the Sheep Hills locals.  

Another BMXer built his dream ramp.  Who's next?


I'm doing a lot of my writing on Substack these days, check it out:

Friday, July 28, 2023

X-Games 2023 BMX highlights


Wow.  Just fucking wow.  

A backwards bunnyhop won real street at Rincon, over the rail, down the big drop.  Fucking wow.

I learned backwards bunnyhops in 1988, because I was a dork, and knew I couldn't hang in flatland anymore, once the locomotive and whiplash were invented.  And by "hang" I mean place in the middle of the pack, in a class of  fifty 17& over intermediates, in flatland at an AFA Masters comp.  

So I started trying a bunch of weird bunnyhop tricks, just seeing what was possible.  Since I rode with skateboarders every weekend at the Huntington Beach Pier, I learned a few skate tricks on my bike, like half-Cabs (roolback to 180 bunnyhop) and no complys (footplant to 180 on flat), backside bonelesses (can-can footplant on a bank), and nollies (nosewheelie into a speed bump to hop).  

In the freestyle world at the time, those weren't even tricks.  Pretty much no one else did them.  Eddie Roman did footplants to 360's, along with dozens of other weird, hard, and innovative tricks.  So goofing around on my own, I got to where I could do 6-7 foot backwards bunnyhops on flat, 6-7 foot half-Cabs (on a freewheel, not freecoaster, so I could launch farther) and full Cabs (rollback to 360 bunnyhop, only landed a few).  I tried a bunch of other bunnyhop tricks, and famously spent years trying to pull a bunnyhop tailwhop, but never landed a single one.  None of those things were even considered tricks at the time.  

Then, 15-20 years later, with stronger bikes, and when street riding had progressed a lot, riders discovered those old skate-inspired tricks, and took them to gaps, drops, ledges, and banks.  They kept pushing them to new levels.  So as a complete dork of a rider from the 80's and 90's, I'm stoked to see an completely fucking insane, HUGE backwards bunnyhop win Real Street at the X-Games.  I never even dreamed something like that would be possible.  Mad props to Colin Varanyak, and all these riders.  

My favorite part of all the X-Games footage I've seen was the cutaway shot during the dirt jumping comp.  The camera panned over to Cory Nastazio, standing near a pole, watching the action, and just goes, "Wow."  Yeah... Wow.  


I'm doing a lot of my writing on Substack these days, check it out:

Wednesday, July 26, 2023

How to save $50 to $500 when you move...

Here's a meme I made from one of my photos, making fun of the crazy rent prices these days.

You've found that new house or apartment, now it's time to hire some movers and move all your stuff to the new place.  But rent and mortgages are expensive, and you need to save some money on the move. How you keep the moving costs to a minimum?  Here's how:

I just wrote a 10 page report on the best ways to save money when you move.  How much?  My goal with these tips is to save you at least $50 and maybe up to $500, off the cost of your move.  

This report is no longer available... I'll put it online some day.  Sorry.   

(steven not steve, don't forget the "v")  I will send you this printable PDF report as soon as I see your order.  Put your email in the info on Paypal, then email me at that email address above, to make sure I see it as soon as possible.  Or hit me up on Facebook, if we're friends there.  I'll send it right out.

Way back in 1991, while living on the floor of a tiny, one bedroom apartment in Huntington Beach, I needed some work.  A friend said, "My brother works on the weekends for a moving company, call this guy."  So I called that guy, and he said, "We need guys this weekend," and told me where to meet their crew.  My first moving job, I helped move a giant IRS office out of their old building, and into the new federal building in downtown Long Beach.  

I wound up working with a hardworking crew of Mexican American guys.  I worked on and off, moving offices on the weekends, for several years.  When I used to work at the TV studios in the summers, I was usually moving offices the rest of the year.  Later, in 1994 through 1997, I worked full time as a household mover.  I moved over 900 houses and apartments in that time.  The tips to save money in this report are not the tips you find on the internet, they are the real things I learned by moving one or two households nearly every day, for over 2 1/2 years.  In all those jobs, moving people's personal possessions, I saw, and moved, some weird stuff.  Here are a few quick stories:

The first household move I did, I was still working for the office movers.  One of the household crews needed an extra guy.  The house was a big, $300,000 tract home (in 1992), in north San Diego county.  The family was an American guy and his wife, and her extended family, from some part of India.  Wherever they came from, it was customary for the men to just piss on the nearest wall when they had to take a leak.  I'm not kidding.  There were piss stains on all the walls of this expensive house, that was only a couple of years old.  The whole house reeked of piss.  It didn't bother the people living there, but we had to try to hold our breath each trip in, to grab a piece of furniture.  That was my start in household moving.  I don't know why I kept doing households.  

Years later, we moved a woman and her daughter into a tri-level condo in Huntington Beach.  We had to get some landscapers working nearby to help push her baby grand piano up the first flight of steps.  The stairway was low, and it actually scraped the ceiling above the steps.  Then the two of us movers got it up to the landing, up the second set of stairs.  It was a bitch.  Baby grand pianos are not only really expensive, they are big, heavy, and awkward.  At the end of the move, my co-worker asked the lady, "So who plays the piano?"  She said, "Oh we don't play, I just like the way a baby grand looks."  We wanted to kill her.  It was just decoration to her.  

One time I was working on one pretty average move.  When we finished, the boss told us to go help another crew.  We got to a good size, two story house, in Fountain Valley, I think.  The owner had a 14 foot long, curved on the end bar in his upstairs den.  It was custom built in that room.  His "den" looked like an actual bar, as in a place you would go to drink.  The custom bar was beautiful, and huge.  The thing was the size of a bar in an actual bar, and had a 90 degree, curved bend on the end, all trimmed in really nice hardwood of some kind.  the guy wanted his bar moved to the new house.  We had to get six movers, and take the huge bar out a window, across the first floor roof, then off the side of the roof.  Then out into the truck.  Cheers!  

One lady in Westminster had us move about half a cord of firewood, which had been sitting for months, on the side of her house.  It was winter, and the wood on the bottom was muddy.  It wasn't that we minded getting muddy, but once our T-shirts were muddy, it was a lot harder to keep the rest of the furniture clean, when we unloaded it.  The weird part was that the house she moved out of didn't have a fireplace.  "Do you have a fireplace at the new house?" we asked her.  "No," she replied, "But my son brought the firewood all the way down from Bishop (in the Sierra Nevada mountains, six hours away), and I don't want to leave it here."   

One Friday, during the busy early summer season, my partner and I got a third moving job for the day.  We were dejected, knowing we had to be back at work at 7am the next day, and would have to move two houses that day, at least.  We were tired, and just wanted to get home, eat, and get some sleep.  The 3rd move turned out to be at the Breakers apartments, near the ocean in Huntington Beach.  The young woman's apartment was on the third floor, with a 4th floor bedroom.  The problem was, The Breakers didn't have elevators.  Everything had to go down three floors, six outside flights of stairs, followed by a 40 yard walk to the truck.  We asked her, "Where are you moving to?"  She replied, "I'm moving to the third floor on the other side of the complex."  Third move of the day, everything went down six flights of stairs, a long walk to the truck, and then a 150 yard drive, then up six flights of stairs, and another floor to her new bedroom.  Luckily it was only a one bedroom apartment, that didn't have much furniture.  The women who live in that complex often call it The Heartbreakers, because the complex is full of young, single people.  There were always a lot of in-the-complex relationships starting and ending.  But us movers called it the Backbreakers, because there were no elevators.  

So there are a few quick tales of my adventures as a furniture movers.  The tips to help save you money when you move, or friends and family, their next move, come from years of pain and misery and pushing cat piss stained couches up stairs on 90 degree days.  So buy a report, It's only $5, and it will definitely pay for itself several times over when you, or your friends or family, move next.   


I'm doing a lot of writing on Substack these days, check it out:

Steve Emig The White Bear's Substack

Tuesday, July 25, 2023

X-Games 2023 dirt finals... and a bit more


First of all, Google maps has to add a new mountain range to their map every time there's a BMX dirt contest now.  The size of the jumps is just ridiculous at this point.  Second, everything the riders are doing, and almost doing, is fucking incredible these days.  But I'm sharing this for one reason, the guy you see comment at 11:06.  Wow.

Here's the Real Street Best Trick... at Rincon... BMX and skate.



The Rabbit Hole...


Alice falling down the rabbit hole.  We all know the basic story.  Only one person made it to the end of my first blog "rabbit hole."  But it's a new idea, so that doesn't surprise me.  If you don't know what I'm talking about, then you just haven't found the rabbit hole.  Just forget I mentioned it.  

If you would like to help support my blogging and writing, and see some exclusive content, you can check out my Patreon page.  You can sign up for as little as $3.43 a month, payments get billed on the 1st of each month, and you can cancel anytime, if it's not for you.  Those who sign up at $7.43 a month or more will get free access to any ebooks and special reports I publish.  Patreon is a way of crowdfunding the creative process, to keep the work flowing.  Check my page at the link above.  

I'm doing a lot of writing on a platform called Substack now.  Check it out:

Wednesday, July 19, 2023

What is the future of movie theaters? Could Barbenheimer save them?


Here's an UrbEx crew checking out an abandoned movie theater.  A bit of recent research on my part made me wonder about the future of movie theaters as a whole, as we slide into what will soon be a massive recession, in my opinion.

It's Wednesday, July 19th, and we're on the verge of what is now tagged as "Barbenheimer" weekend.  After a decent summer movie season, theaters are still trying to claw back to pre-pandemic sales numbers.  In a juxtaposition like so many in our fucked up, weird, post pandemic world, the Barbie movie, and the story of the first atomic bomb, Oppenheimer,* are both opening this Friday, July 21.  They're even being sold as a double feature.  While the movie and TV writers and actors strike, the movie industry is hoping for a huge weekend of ticket sales to help get theater viewing back up to pre-pandemic sales figures.  

I'm a huge movie fan, though my sketchy lifestyle has kept me from seeing many movies in the last several years.  At one point, when I was a taxi driver, I often saw two or three movies a week, during the afternoon matinees, when taxi business was slow.  But thoughts of an abandoned theater I pass by once in a while spurred me to doing a bit of research.  I got to day dreaming about turning the old theater into an indie art gallery, with indie movies as well.  Just a cool daydream of a business idea.  That particular theater, part of the Regal/UA chain, has been empty for about three years.  Obviously the pandemic played a role, but I wondered why.  

It turns out Regal and UA (formerly United Artists) theaters in the U.S., have been owned by a British theater company, called Cineworld.  Like the theater industry overall, Cineworld isn't doing so well.  In fact, their stock is now selling (or not selling, I guess) for just over 1/2 a cent (U.S.) per share.  On the long term chart, their stock has literally flatlined.  So the owners of the 505 Regal theaters in the U.S. are, themselves, on financial life support.  Cineworld was supposed to come up with new financing in July 2023, but that, apparently didn't work out.  So in late June, Cineworld, already in Chapter 11 in the U.S., filed for "Administration" in the U.K.  All their assets will be transferred into a new entity called Crown, which will be owned by their lenders.  So U.K. bankers now own Crown, which was Cineworld, which owns the 505 Regal and Regal/UA theaters in the U.S..  And when the bankers own a huge business they lost a shit-ton of money on, there's probably more changes coming before too long.  Anybody want to buy a movie theater?  Or ten?  Or 505?

Meanwhile... AMC Theaters, a popular meme stock in 2021, did better in the first quarter of 2023, than in 2022.  But they still lost $235 million for the quarter.  Business was building back, post pandemic, but they still have a long way to go to profitability.  AMC stock, now at $4.37 a share as I write this, is holding steady.  The stock soared to nearly $60 a share in 2021, at the height of the meme stock action.

Will U.S. theaters make a solid comeback, even in a recession?  Or will most of the theaters wind up like the one in the UrbEx video above?  I hope the industry can make a comeback, as a lifelong movie fan.  But times are tough, the fate of the (theater world) may come down to Barbenheimer,  so let's hope Barbenhemier weekend is big, let's hope Barbenheimer weekend is HUGE, and helps the ailing theater industry get back on solid footing again.   

Blogger's note- Monday- 7/24/2023- "Barbenheimer tops $235 million domestic debut..."  The Barbie movie and Oppenheimer both had huge opening weekends.  Me, as a homeless guy, wasn't able to see either movie.  But I'm glad they did well, because I love going to see movies in theaters, just in general, and the AMC and Regal theater chains are both struggling after the long pandemic period.  You can argue over how good each movie was, that's your business.  I just want to see theaters themselves survive, and the big Barbenheimer weekend helped movie theaters overall, and I'm happy for that.  I want movie theaters to still exist in the future, when I get my act together, and can afford to go watch movies again, on a regular basis.  This weird mash-up of movies helped that cause.  

Blogger's note: Monday- 7/31/2023- Barbenheimer is a billion dollar win for the global box office- CNBC report today.  While the writer's and actor's strikes continue, the movie business and struggling theaters get a couple of big wins.


* Oh yeah, there's a huge push by the globalists types to bring back nuclear energy in a big way in the coming years, as part of the "green" energy agenda.  That's why many business types are talking about uranium stocks and such, and why there's a major movie about Oppenheimer.  Plutonium-239 has a half life of about 24,000 years.  The longest lived human civilizations have survived maybe 2,000 years.  What could possibly go wrong?

I'm doing a lot of writing on a platform called Substack now.  Check it out:


 

Locked out of Facebook... Jeeeeeez....

 In the never ending saga of 23 years of attack by some part of the Christian Right power structure/network, I've now been locked out of my Facebook account.  My account shutdown a couple days ago, while I was on FB, and had me review information, which included a bogus phone number, added to the account in 2019.  So I said that was erroneous info, and my account opened back up.  Now my password doesn't work.  No option to re-open it.  A hack of some kind, apparently.  

You can find me on Twitter: @steveemig43  

At least for now, my Twitter feed was full of religious garbage this morning, as well.  Seriously, this shit's been going on, in one form or another, since my bank account (that I'd had for about 12 years) got shut down two weeks after 9/11, way back in 2001.  These douchebags want me completely off the internet, since I have a habit of predicting financial market inflection points before they happen.  And they just hate creative people, in general.  Same shit, different day.  

This is everyday bullshit for me.  These douchebags forced me out of California in 2008, to North Carolina, a state where I got stuck in and couldn't find any job, for ten years, except about 10 months losing money as a taxi driver.  I will not willingly set foot in North Carolina for the rest of my life.  I hate the whole fucking state.  I met a few cool people there, but it was ten years of living hell for me.  I'll keep blogging as long as I can...

Just another day...

Blogger's note:  5:43 pm, same day.  I was able to get back in this afternoon.  The screen the came up this morning had no other option to sign in.  Never seen that screen before.  So that's cool.  Still hate NC.  

I'm doing a lot of writing on a platform called Substack now.  Check it out:

Steve Emig The White Bear's Substack



Saturday, July 15, 2023

The 1987 AFA Freestyle Masters championships finals


This contest was the 1987 finals for the AFA, only the third year BMX freestyle was an actual sport.  It was held at the Olympic Velodrome on the Cal State Dominguez Hills campus.  

This is a contest a worked at as an AFA crew guy, basically a roadie.  I also got roped into judging 3 or 4 of the amateur flatland classes.  The next year, while I was working at Unreel Productions, they edited this into both a home video, and it was part of Unreel's six show Sports on the Edge, the first syndicated action sports TV series, in 1988-89.  

I'm doing a lot of writing on a platform called Substack now.  Check it out:

Steve Emig The White Bear's Substack

Tuesday, July 11, 2023

The unexpected revival of American Gladiators in 2023


Here's the trailer for the Netflix docu-series about American Gladiators which started airing on Netflix on June 28.  I haven't seen either the Netflix shows or the ESPN documentary.  The hit TV show, which ran for 8 seasons from 1989-1996, has suddenly popped back up, with a new edition of the British version of the show, Gladiators, coming out.  I heard a rumor of a U.S. reboot of the show, but haven't seen any definite info.  


Chillin' with Ice podcast- by Lori Fetrick, Ice from American Gladiators  (several episodes are out)

American Gladiator TV show intros- 1989-1997

All this talk about American Gladiators this year, and not one shout out to Lico the spotter (coolest TV industry person I ever met), and not one word about the "Puppet People"  What the fuck people?  

So... most of you who read this blog know me, or know of me, from my days as a mediocre BMX freestyler, and BMX/skateboard industry guy in the 1980's.  I stumbled into video work completely accidentally in 1987, when my boss at the American Freestyle Association asked me to produce a contest video.  That first video (see the previous post) led to more videos, and a job at Unreel Productions later that year.  Unreel was the video arm of the Vision Skateboards/Vision Street Wear empire in the late 1980's.  I worked there from December 1987, until July of 1990.  With the skateboard, BMX, and snowboard industries all tanking then, there was a mass exodus.  

A woman I worked with at Unreel found a job at a "real" TV production company in Studio City, just over the hill from Hollywood.  One day, a few months later, she gave me a call.  "We need someone to log a bunch of footage where I'm at, what are you up to?"  I wasn't up to much, so I made the long drive from Huntington Beach to The Valley the next day, where I spent ten hours logging footage of interviews of monster truck and mud racing drivers.  Logging is industry talk for watching the footage of the event, and taking notes, like "John from Bigfoot jokes about blowing a tire at 43:27."  Not exciting, but it paid.  They asked me to come back the next day, and the next, and the next.  I worked on a day by day basis for two months, I think.  Finally they made it official, and called me full time.  That's how I got my first "real" TV job at G.R.B. Motorsports, working on the production crew (office staff) of that year's supercross and monster truck TV series.  

Those kinds of productions last for a few months, and we rented office space in a large building from a production/edit company called Four Point Entertainment.  By the time I quit that GRB a few months later, I was doing three jobs for the price of one.  They hired two P.A.'s to replace me, and part of the work still wasn't getting done.  

Four Point was where American Gladiators shows were edited.  The next year, I called up the secretary and asked if Gladiators needed people that summer.  I called too early, and had to call back a couple of times.  Finally the secretary said, "We have two jobs available, talent attendant and spotter."  "What's a talent attendant?" I asked.  She told me that it was a person to ran errands and pretty much got the Gladiators whatever they needed, "I wouldn't give that job to my worst enemy," she laughed.  "OK, what's a spotter?"  "I have no idea?" she replied.  "Sounds good, put me on the list as a spotter."  So she did.  

A month later, I walked onto the CBS-MTM studio lot, in Studio City, as we called it then, and looked for Stage 3.  I had no idea what my job was going to be.  That's how I got a job on a hit TV show for season 5, in the summer of 1992.  I worked the final four seasons as a spotter, those guys on the sideline with the white karate pads.  I didn't like the American Gladiators TV show before that, and made fun of my roommate Bill, who was a big fan of the show.  But it was a lot of fun, and really hard work, to work on it, and I'm glad I took the job.  I worked the last four of the eight seasons of the show.  I was the head spotter, leader of 7 other guys on the crew, for the last two seasons.  

We worked for about 6 or 7 weeks in the summer, when almost every other show was on hiatus, the TV industry term for summer vacation.  So the huge lot was pretty much empty when we taped the show.  We had 6 or 7 days of practice, where both Gladiators and contenders would practice the different games, on opposite sides of the huge, aircraft hanger size stage.  Since they were the show, both groups needed people to practice against.  The producers didn't want either Gladiators or contenders to get injured before we taped the shows, so us spotters practiced several of the games against both.  We played Gladiators for the contenders, and played contenders for the Gladiators.  So I ran through Break Through and wrestled in the Conquer ring, played Powerball, ran through The Gauntlet, and practiced against them with pugil sticks.  I was in pretty decent shape then, having worked moving as a furniture mover for a while.  But I still got knocked around a lot.  I got the worst concussion of my life when little April Wheat from Texas got thrown down the pyramid, did a flip, and accidentally heel-kicked me in the side of the head.  My pupils wouldn't change size for 2 1/2 days, so that was a pretty good concussion.  But, overall, it was a lot of fun.  

Then we moved to the actual taping of the shows, and we taped two shows each day, completing the whole season in about 5 weeks.  We'd set up one game, have the contests for two separate shows, then clear that out, and set up another game.  Us spotters worked with the grips, riggers, and camera crew to change the sets.  One old crew guy told me we did the biggest set changes in the history of TV, and we did them 7 times a day.  Most sitcoms might do a couple of set changes, much, much smaller ones, a day.  Hell, we moved a 30 foot tall mobile pyramid in and out of the stage.  We worked our asses off.  Our "down" time, as spotters, was actually when they were playing the games.  That was the fun part, and when we got to rest a bit.  

So that's a little bit about how I wound up stumbling from the BMX freestyle world onto the crew of a hit TV show.  If you were a fan of the show, check out the documentaries, and Lori's (Ice) podcast, I've listened to five of her episodes, and they've all been really interesting.  While I have a bunch of memories from the show, I doubt I'll write any more posts about it.  I've got a lot of other stuff I'd rather write about these days.  All of the sudden there's all this other content about the show, so check out any of it that sounds interesting at the links above.  


As of late summer of 2023, I'm doing most of my new writing on Substack.  Check it out:



Monday, July 10, 2023

The first video I produced and directed: AFA Oregon Pro Flatland in 1987


Held in an arena in Portland, Oregon, in 1987, this video of AFA Freestyle Masters was the first video I ever directed.  Getting the job of producing this video is another thing that pretty much changed the course of my life in the BMX world, though I didn't realize it until months later.  Unreel Productions editor Dave Alvarez and founder Don Hoffman shepherded me through the video production process, because I didn't have a clue what I was doing.  I haven't seen this video since about 1988, I just stumbled on it on YouTube.

The riders in the intro are: Ron Wilkerson, unknown, Darren Pelio (?), Mike Loveridge, Mike Perkins, Kenneth Evans, Jason Parkes, Rick Allison, Dave Vanderspek (with skateboard), Dave Nourie, Martin Aparijo, and R.L. Osborn (not counting the mugshots of riders watching). 

This video has all of the pro flatland runs, start to finish, with no cuts.  Basically, it was cheaper to do it that way, to not edit the runs.  Plus , we didn't pay for the edit time at Unreel, ($150 to $200 an hour or so then), we couldn't take forever editing this.  I think we edited this video in two eight hour edit sessions.  The pro riders, in order, are: Robert Peterson, Josh White, Dave Nourie, Rick Allison, Ron Wilkerson, Martin Aparijo, Fred Blood, Dave Vanderspek, Chris Lashua, Pete Agustin, and R.L. Osborn.  

I was at the Oregon contest, mostly as an AFA roadie, but also as a rider.  What I remember most from this contest was that Oregon 1987 was the contest when scuffing took off, thanks to the backyard, the backwards on the back wheel scuffing trick, which came from out of the San Francisco Golden Gate Park scene.  I think Tim Treacy invented the trick, but I can't remember for sure.  

But that was the trick of the contest, everyone was trying to learn it in the jam circles around the contest site, and at the hotel at night.  The first scuffing trick I know of was one Oleg Konings did, as far back as 1984, standing on one peg, on the side of the bike.  Of the pros at this contest, only Robert Peterson did a single scuffing trick.  But that one trick, the backyard, caught fire at this contest, and began to change freestyle forever.  It started with a whole range of one wheel, forward rolling tricks, while scuffing.  Soon after, came the popularity of the hang 5, the whiplash, Kevin Jones and the locomotive, and the trend towards one wheel scuffing, and later gliding tricks.  So while there's not a single backyard in this video, that was the big bit of progression that happened at this contest.  

Another phase of riding changes was the trend toward linking tricks together that was gaining popularity in early 1987.  R.L. Osborn was one of the first pros to begin linking tricks.  He also did the backwards grip ride at the end, a mind blowing trick for that time period.  As far as the linking went, several other pros were still in the: do a trick, ride a bit, do a trick, ride a bit, format.  That had been the standard until then.  In the intro, you can see an amateur rider, who I think is Darren Pelio (SE uniform) linking several tricks, and also Kenneth Evans (white uniform) also linking several tricks.  That was another rising trend at the time.  Soon they merged, with the scuffing and gliding, one wheel rolling tricks being linked together.  As far as riding goes, those were two big trends at this contest. 

Another thing at this contest was the ever revolutionary Dave Vanderspek, always ahead of his time, using a skateboard in his run.  You can hear the crowd cheering, we all loved it.  The judges, unfortunately for Dave, didn't like it, and Dave placed at the back of the pro pack, getting 7th or 8th I think.  After we got back to California, Dave called the AFA, trying to figure out why he didn't place higher.  Since I had ridden up in the Bay area for a bit, I wound up on the phone with Dave for maybe 20 minutes, trying to explain that I didn't know why the judges didn't like the skateboard addition to his routine.  He got more people cheering than anyone, but judging was based mostly on doing the most popular tricks well, not touching down a foot, and a little bit of originality.  For what it's worth, Dave's crazy bike/skate run later got featured in the Vision Street Wear video Mondo Vision, which sold about 40,000 copies, and no other BMX flatlander got featured.  In the long run, Dave Vanderspek got far more coverage from this contest than anyone else. 

The one other thing I remember from this contest was that the parking lot had a couple of levels.  There was a big, wide ramp up to the higher level, kind of like a flyout jump, but for cars.  As the main AFA roadie guy, I got sent out in the rental minivan to run errands, several times, on the day or two before the contest.  The parking plot was completely empty then.  Every time I hit that ramp a bit faster, and finally hit it at 50 or 55 mph.  I'm pretty sure I got the minivan completely off the ground.  So that was memorable for me.  I may have just topped out the shocks, but I think I got a couple inches of air.  If so, that's the only time I ever jumped a motorized vehicle.  

It would be hard for today's riders to even imagine the BMX freestyle world of the 1980's.  No cell phones, no Instagram, no social media at all, no internet, and only a handful of people owned their own video cameras, mostly big VHS ones,  personal computers were just becoming a thing, the revolutionary Apple Macinstosh had only been out for 3 years.  One of them might have 6 KILObytes of memory, if you had an external hard drive.  A kilobyte is 1/1,000th of a megabyte.  None of those desktops could edit video, they were for word processing and simple games, the "desktop publishing" revolution was just getting going.  Back in those days, when we went riding, we just went riding.  Nobody was shooting video or photos, unless you were doing a magazine photo shoot.  We didn't document our sessions, we just rode.  

In 1987, when I produced this video for the American Freestyle Association (AFA), only BMX companies made videos, riders didn't make their own videos.  The only rider-made freestyle videos I'd seen before this were some 5 minute clips edited by New York rider Carl Marquardt, Eddie Roman's school project, the 15 or so minute version of  Aggro Riding and Kung Fu Fighting, and the Gork Video, which BMX Action editor Gork made, all from 1986.  

In the mid 1980's, professional video cameras cost $20,000 to $50,000, and the equipment.  To make a video of anything back then, from an industrial training or promotion video, to a local TV commercial, to a BMX freestyle video, you had to hire a professional video production company.  One early BMX video cost $40,000 to shoot, edit, and produce.  Then you had to get the VHS tapes made, about $3 each, and design and get boxes printed, and then ship out the orders.  The BMX Action Trick Team/magazine video,  Rippin', came out in 1985, and was produced in a full documentary style.  That's what the video crew knew how to do, make short documentaries.  The BMX Plus! video, Freestyle's Raddest Tricks, also came out in 1985, in more of a live TV show style.  That was the first video I bought, and I watched it 7 times the day it came in the mail, twice while balancing on my bike in the living room through the whole video.  Seriously.  GT Bikes made GT-V in 1986, and only a handful more videos came out before 1990.  

At that point, the first skateboard videos, , and Powell-Peralta's The Bones Brigade Video Show (1984), and Vision's SkateVisions (1985), had only come out a couple years earlier.  The whole concept of making skateboard and BMX videos was just being invented.  The natural idea was to make a "little movie on video," with some bad acting, and often some goofy comedy bits.  There was no standard way to make a BMX or skateboard video yet.  So different people were trying different ideas for several years.

The cheaper way to make videos was Wayne's World style, by producing TV shows for a local PBS channel, where you got to borrow cameras and editing equipment.  You had to produce a TV show to air, but you could also work on your own ideas while you had the borrowed equipment, or make a home video out of your public access show.  That's what Don Hoffman, who later formed Unreel Productions with Vision Skateboards did.  If you're an Old School BMX freestyler and don't known who Don Hoffman is, you should.  Don made videos like this, which also aired as local TV shows on PBS, before making videos for Vision Skateboards, Sims Snowboards, and Vision Street Wear.  He started BMX and skateboard videos in about 1984, before the other companies got into the game.  In this short clip, you can see Don Hoffman on the left, Bob Morales, who started the AFA, in the middle, and, of course, Eddie Fiola on the right.  Don was actually the biggest pioneer of BMX videos, having made 7 or 8 PBS shows/videos by 1987, of most of the ASPA/AFA skatepark contests.

Bob Morales hired me to be the editor of the AFA newsletter, American Freestyle,  in late January of 1987, about a month after I got laid off from FREESTYLIN' magazine because I didn't like the band Skinny Puppy.  For the ballin' amount of $5 an hour (CA minimum wages was $3.35/hour then), I became the editor/photographer of the monthly newsletter that went out to about 3,000 AFA members.  But the AFA was a tiny business, consisting of just Bob, his sister Riki, and me, when I started.  So I also answered phones, put heat transfers on T-shirts, helped fold and address all 3,000 newsletters, was a roadie at AFA contests, and did anything else that came up.  I went from a few months of sitting in an office without much to do most of the time, to doing all kinds of different stuff every day.  

About three months into working there, Bob walked into the back office where I worked and asked if I wanted to make a TV commercial for the Austin, Texas contest.  He learned he could buy local spots on MTV for $25 each.  Since I had absolutely no idea how to make a TV commercial, and since I worked for Bob and new he expected me to do it anyway, I said, "Sure."  There was a huge, "We'll figure it out as we go" attitude at the AFA, DIY all the way when it came to anything new.  "How do I make a TV commercial," I asked.  "Call Don Hoffman at Unreel, he'll tell you," Bob replied.  I had no idea that 30 second conversation in 1987 would lead to me producing 15 BMX, skateboard, and snowboard videos, working on about 10 Vision videos, and working on over 300 TV episodes of about a dozen different shows.  But that's how life works, sometimes little conversations or incidents lead to a whole new direction in life.  

For the 1987 AFA Freestyle Masters national series, Vision Street Wear clothes were a sponsor.  Part of the deal was that they would send a cameraman to each of the six contests around the country.  For the Oregon contest, that was an Unreel producer/cameraman named Gary Langenheim.  He had worked mostly on surf TV shows before Unreel.  The deal with the video footage was that both AFA and Vision/Unreel could use any of the footage for commercials, home videos, or whatever.  So I called up Don Hoffman at Unreel, and he said to come over the next day, and they'd give me VHS copies of all the raw footage, window dubs, as they were called.  There was a box in the picture when the videos played, a "window" with rolling numbers.  That told me the time code.  I would watch the videos at home, and write down the time code of each shot I wanted, then make a list of all those shots.  When I did that, they told me to come back, and they'd set up a session to come in an edit the video.  

Luckily I rented a room from a guy who was an ex-video editor himself, so we had a cool TV and VCR set-up, which made it easier.  So I spent a few nights and part of a weekend watching all the footage, maybe three hours of total footage.  But when you pause the video to write down the numbers, it takes much longer to "log" the footage.  I went through all the video, and wrote down everything interesting, the best riding, and also face shots and crowd shots (cutaway shots), and the start and end times of each pro rider's run.  After about a week, I had that done, and called up Unreel again.  

They scheduled an edit session with their video editor, a techno wizard in the form of a 25-year-old guy named Dave Alvarez, with long, straight brown hair, Vision board shorts, and a different tie dyed shirt every day.  They led me back up to Unreel's $500,000 Betacam edit bay (similar to this), which was capable of editing broadcast TV shows.  The room was in the back, on the second floor, of the Unreel offices.  It had about a dozen monitors (TV screens), and two banks of VTR's (pro caliber VCR's), which cost $5,000 to $20,000 each.  There were two really nice office chairs on a linoleum floor, then a bar type thing behind them.  You could step up, and there was a big, black leather chair and couch, so other people could watch an editing session.  That room blew my mind, and intimidated me.  I felt like I was on the bridge in Star Trek in there, except the lighting was always low.

For the intro, Dave picked some music, which I think he and another guy named Dave had created and recorded themselves.  It was either that or canned music, which in the 1980's was usually kind of bland, electronic music, that video producers could buy, and use in videos as much as they wanted.  You could get seriously sued for using popular, copyrighted music in those pre-internet, pre sharing economy days.  Canned music was used in a wide variety of home videos in those days.  I remember hearing some of the same music used in a BMX Plus! video also used in multiple porno videos.  

Anyhow, Dave introduced me to what he called "fancy news editing." By laying down the music track first, he could then play me a short piece of the music, and say, "I need a shot that looks like this sounds."  I'd go through my log sheets, to a shot that was about the right length, that I thought would fit the music, and tell him the time code.  Dave would pull up that shot, and fit it over the music, so that the beginning of the shot, any movements, and the end of the shot, would all fall right on beats of the music.  This takes much longer to do well, than just chopping shots together, but it flows and watches much better.  That was one of the first video editing tricks Dave Alvarez taught me.  

It was really fun sitting there and directing a video, shot by shot, in that crazy edit bay room.  Dave and I got along well, and only argued about the length of the shots.  As a video editor, he wanted to "keep the video tight," and get out of a shot as quick as possible.  That makes the video flow better, and not seem to lag.  But as a BMX freestyler myself, I wanted to extend shots, to show that the rider actually landed the trick and rode away.  We argued quite a bit at first about this, and wound up splitting the difference much of the time.  He'd make shots a tad longer than he normally would have, but they would show the landing of the tricks, not just a really quick shot mid trick.  Actions sports videos actually did change how videos and TV shows got made later on, bringing our views as riders and skaters into account.  Things like shooting with a fisheye lens close-up, to get the full body in a shot, and riding skateboards or rollerblades with a camera, next to someone to get shot, and many other things became more popular from all their use in 1990's BMX, skateboard, snowboard, and other action sports videos. 

In the edit bay, Dave and I spent most of the first day just editing the intro of the video, and the second day we edited the rest of the video, because they were much simpler, cuts edits, and because the pros flatland runs were 4 minutes long, with no editing during the runs.  This made this a pretty simple video to edit, from Dave's standpoint.  There were minimal effects, and long segments, so the editing went quick.  "Effects are an excuse for bad editing most of the time" Dave taught me.  

When we got to the credits, I was actually surprised when Dave told me I was the "director."  In my head, a director was someone like Steven Spielberg or George Lucas, spending months or years making big, complicated movies.  But Dave explained how it worked in home videos.  The executive producer was one or more people who paid for the thing, or ran the company that paid for it.  They often had nothing to do with actually making the video.  The producer was the person in charge of actually making sure the whole project got done.  The director was the person who actually picked what shots went in the video, and in what order.  The editor was the person actually at the controls, editing the video clips together.  So, for the whopping sum of $250 that I got paid to be the producer and director of this AFA video, I was both producer and director.  It sounded way more prestigious than it was, but I was cool with that.  

After we finished editing the show, Unreel made a duplication master, that's a high quality copy of the original master tape, so they didn't wear out the master tape every time they made copies from it.  Everything was edited on actual videotape then, digital video editing was still a few years away for the high end TV shows, and about a decade away for prosumer video.  Since the AFA only sold a few dozen of this video, and the ones that followed, Unreel made us a few copies when we needed them. I went over Costa Mesa and picked them up, then we'd ship them out at the AFA ourselves.  

Home videos generally cost about $30 each then, so even after paying me and paying Unreel for the video copies, there was a good profit in it for the AFA.  Selling 40 to 60 of each of these contest videos, made the AFA maybe $500 to $1,000 bucks on each video.  That's not huge by video standards.  But money was always tight at the AFA.  Bob Morales didn't take much of a salary from the AFA, if any at all.  He actually made his living then mostly from creating ads for several BMX companies, and his other business ventures, like Mor Distributing, and Auburn Bikes.  

So that's how I wound up being one of the first actual riders to produce and direct a few of the early, if not that popular, BMX freestyle videos.  I ended up doing six videos for the AFA in 1987, one each for flatland and ramps, from the Oregon, Texas, and Ohio contests.  A couple of the clips from those videos made it into Mark Eaton's Joe Kid on a Stingray BMX documentary, many years later, in 2005.  The shot at 2:18 of Matt Hoffman in that trailer, and the following shot of Kevin Jones doing a locomotive, were from the AFA videos I did.  I had nothing to do with Joe Kid on a Stingray, but it was cool to see a couple of those AFA videos survived  for over15 years, and that Mark used a couple shots from them.  

I mentioned at the top of this post that Dave Alvarez was a techno wizard of an editor.  I'm not just saying that because he made this video, and the next 5 I did for the AFA, look really professional.  Local TV new personality, Chuck Henry, ended up stealing Dave from Unreel Productions in late 1989, I think.  Dave went to work at KABC, editing Chuck's news magazine show, Eye on L.A.*.  In his first year of editing in Hollywood, Dave Alvarez won an emmy for his work, so he really was, and is, a top notch video editor.  

So that's the story of the first video I produced and directed.  The Oregon Pro Flatland video led to those five other videos for the AFA, and then to getting hired to work at Unreel Productions in December of 1987.  Beginning as a guy dubbing videos for different people at Vision and Unreel, I wound up becoming an decent cameraman, and working on a whole lot more home videos and TV shows, over the next 8 years.  That 30 second conversation with Bob Morales, agreeing to make a low budget TV commercial, changed the direction of my working life.  



As of the late summer of 2023, I'm doing most of my new writing on Substack, a platform designed for writers.  Check it out:


*This isn't one of the shows Dave edited, just one episode available on YouTube.  But there is some skateboarding in the end of that episode linked.  

Saturday, July 8, 2023

Welcome to Dystopia... inflation and homeless and tweekers, Oh my!

 One day in October 2019, I woke up with this idea for a big writing project.  I have been an armchair futurist thinker since I was a kid.  I've been trying to figure out what comes next, and where society is heading for many years.  I'm just a geek on economic and future trends and stuff like that, I read big books and listen to content that would bore the crap out of most people.  I had a whole bunch of ideas, based on theories I first read about in the 1990's, that the 2020's would see a major recession, maybe a great depression, and a whole lot of other change.  These ideas were al kind of related, bouncing around my brain.  I hadn't tried to organize them in any coherent way.  

The big idea was to watch 20 or 30 trailers to dystopian future movies from the 1960's, 1970's, and 1980's, and see how the future those writers and directors predicted compared with that year, 2019.  I realized I was living in the "future" of my high school self.  In a weird coincidence, the sci-fi classic Blade Runner, from 1982, was set in Los Angeles in November of 2019.  That tripped me out.

That idea turned into a 7 month project, and became a 20 chapter "book/blog thing" I titled:

Welcome to Dystopia: The Future is Now- Book 1

I wrote and published this project as a blog, from November 2019 until the first week in June, 2020.  So I started this 3-4 months before the pandemic his U.S. shores.  It's had a little over 3,000 page views in 3 years.  Not bad, considering it's big, theories most people have never heard of, and hard to read.  

Today I wrote a quick Facebook post, linking a news piece of how Republican judges are begging the Supreme Court to shoot down the "Boise decision," which validates the civil rights of homeless people in western states (the 9th Circuit).  The ruling allows homeless people, like me, to sleep outside legally, when the city doesn't have beds available for everyone.  

That post that I didn't think much about got 10 or 12 comments in minutes, from across the spectrum.  So I liked everyone's comment, thanking them for adding their 2 cents worth, even if I disagreed.  Then I wrote a big response of my own, several bullet points that most people don't realize about homelessness.  One major point is that the rise in homeless people is a nationwide issue, in big cities in red states and blue states, and it's not a Democrat or Republican fuck up, it's a bi-partisan shitstorm.  The homeless issue is not just a San Francisco, L.A., Seattle thing.  Pick a major city, red or blue state, and look it up with "homeless crisis" on YouTube.  There's bums (like me) pretty much everywhere.  Except Gary, Indiana, there's like 12,000 abandoned houses there.  

In that initial Facebook post, I joked that I was "just waiting for the bus ride to the concentration camp," because that seems to be the solution many people on the far right favor to deal with homelessness.  I also mentioned that homeless people were the first people in the Nazi concentration camps.  I heard that from a Pacifica archives interview, on KPFK radio, in the early 2000's.  Back in the 1960's, I believe, someone was interviewing a woman who was 8 or 9 years old when the Nazis rose to power in Germany, and she lived in Berlin.  She said the first time she realized something was really wrong was when her family drove around Berlin one day, and all the homeless people had disappeared.  Just GONE.  And the adults wouldn't say a word about it.  As a young girl, she knew something was wrong.  It was months, maybe a year or two, before rumors of intellectuals, dissidents, Jews, Gypsies, and others were being taken to camps.  But the sudden disappearance of all the homeless people was the first clue she had to how bad things were beginning to get.  

As mentioned in this You Tube short video, there were badges on the German concentration camp uniforms, designating what group a prisoner belonged to.  A downward pointing black triangle was for lesbians, derelicts (aka homeless people), and some similar groups.  There were several other badges, the most well known being the gold Jewish star for Jews.  

I've been trying to simply make a living, as a writer/artist, in a 21st century way, for over a decade now. I've spent over 15 years in and out of  homelessness, in the past 24 years.  I was working for 35 hours or more (up to 80+) a week, for 7 or 8 of my homeless years.  If there was a job I could get, and actually do, that paid enough to rent a room or apartment, I would have done it a long time ago.  

I lived in my taxi, working 70-80+ hours a week, for 5 1/2 years (1999-2007) and wound up unable to make money any more.  The taxi cost $550-$600 a week to lease, and I just couldn't make enough anymore, as the industry declined due to new technology.  I went from working 80 hours one week to living on the streets the next week, in November of 2007.  A year later, I went back East, to North Carolina, where my family ended up living, and could not get hired for any job, except driving a taxi for a year, for ten years.  I couldn't get a job as a gas station clerk, nothing, back there.  I started selling my Sharpie art in late 2015 because I couldn't find a "real" job.  I wasn't trying to become a famous artist, I was trying to make any money I could with the one thing I could do back there, and sell online.  I've been a working, if usually homeless, artist for 7 1/2 years now.  I've been able to sell art, and scrape by, but not ratchet it up to a livable income.

My point here is that the huge homeless crisis across the U.S. today is part of a much bigger transition, a change in society from the fading Industrial Age to the emerging, but not fully developed, Information Age.  There's a huge demographic issue, along with all the other issues, creating a huge number of people, like myself, who have "fallen through the cracks" of working life.  This began with the closing of thousands of factories in the late 1970's and early 1980's, and continues today.  

The homeless housing programs don't put people back to work, they put people on taxpayer-paid-for programs that house them for a while.  Most people bounce out of the programs within a few months or a couple of years.  If they begin to make a living, they lose housing, medical, and everything else.  So they don't work, just do side hustles for cash.  

Your tax dollars (an now inflation) pay for these people's rent, food, all medical expenses, and even their furniture, big screen TV, and Netflix bills.  You are already paying for around an estimated 6 to 10 million people, who are living off of government checks.  The housing programs are not set up to get homeless people working, paying their own rent, and paying taxes again.  That's reality.  

Go to any housing person and ask them, "Show me ten former homeless people who are making $40K or more a year, and paying their own rent."  They can't do it.  Only a hand full of people, out of every thousand, go back to full time work, and that's usually with help form family or friends.  That's the system, homelessness IS AN INDUSTRY.* It pays businesses and non-profit organizations, who pay employees, buy supplies, and do projects.**  Once those businesses and non-profits get going, they want to stay in business.  To stay in business, they need a continuous supply of bums.  Homeless people are a commodity in an industry now, and we all know it, but normal working people, like yourselves, generally don't.  

This knowledge, and a whole bunch of other things I've learned about homelessness, is part of a book I don't want to write.  One, I'm sick of the issue.  Two, whatever I wrote would be used against other homeless people in the future.  Most people have no idea what's going on, or why homeless people don't get jobs, and why the number of homeless people keeps going up.  

L.A., as just recently reported, has 9% more people than it did a year ago (L.A. Times article).  The problem isn't going away soon, even if the extreme right wingers had us all shipped to American concentration camps.  There'd be 30,000 more bums on the streets in a year or two, because there are many different forces leading people to become homeless.  The coming recession will make the problem worse, for a while, anyhow.

We have something like 12 million vacant homes and condos in the U.S., plus thousands of commercial buildings, empty.  We COULD house everyone in the U.S..  We, as a nation, currently choose not to.  That's the reality.  There's a guy living in a tent, on the sidewalk, in front of a vacant storefront, a mile from where I'm sitting right now.  That store has been vacant for about a year.  That's the dichotomy of the problem right now.  It's not going to change anytime soon.  

I think my big "book/blog thing," Dystopia, linked above, explains the Big Picture better than anything else I've seen.  It's based on three big theories of human society that most people haven't heard of.  If you're interested in that, check it out.  

One last thought.  The Ten Year Plan to End Homelessness rolled out in 2002.  It was adapted in many cities in the 2-4 years after that.  The overall homeless population increased dramatically, instead.  Perhaps that was really the 10 year plan to MONETIZE homelessness.  Or perhaps it just wasn't a great plan.  I'm not sure.  

Meanwhile, I'll keep writing, drawing my Sharpie pictures, and trying to create my own job, and rent a place some day.  

*OK, this former sheriff was very controversial, and I'm not of fan of him, in general.  But on this issue, he's right.

** The tiny homes in L.A. have cost an average of $42,000 per bed, PLUS $55 a night, per bed, for service fees.  L.A. could house the homeless in Extended Stay Americas for less money.  For REAL.  

As of the summer of 2023, I'm doing most of my new writing on Substack, a platform designed for writers.  Check it out:

Steve Emig: The White Bear's Substack

Thursday, July 6, 2023

57 years on planet Earth... wandering


Kansas' hit song, "Carry on Wayward Son," is a song I used to run to the radio to turn up as a kid.  Growing up in a really tense household, it always seemed like these guys were singing just to me.  "Hang on kid, just carry on, it'll make sense some day."

I've always loved wandering.  My family moved nearly every year when I was a kid, which I eventually realized was due more to our family's dysfunction, than my dad finding a new job.  When we landed in a new place, I would start wandering the new neighborhood, the local woods, and the area around.  I did this as far back as I can remember, even at about 5 years old.  I would wander off into the woods, along a creek, through the cornfields, or whatever was around.  

To me wandering is the essence of exploring, going off in a direction, with no goal in mind.  I'd head off one place, and see something off in the distance, and wonder what it was, or what was beyond it. So I'd head that way.  When I got to that point, I amble around a bit and explore the area.  Before long, something else would catch my eye, off in another direction.  I'd head off that way.  There were times later on, on a family camping trip in Ohio, in the desert of southeastern New Mexico, or the miles and miles of open sagebrush country Boise, Idaho, or on my BMX bike, around San Jose or Southern California, where I'd walk 8 or 10 miles, or ride 15 or 20, just exploring by myself.  I still wander on a regular basis.

BMX freestyle led me to Southern California, and to writing.  My wandering went inward as well, at age ten I remember pondering whether our lives were predetermined or whether we actually had free will, since I couldn't make too many of my own decisions then.  I wandered through a few hundred books over the course of my life.  I've also wandered into my own thoughts, good and bad.  I wandered through a weird series of odd jobs, from menial restaurant work, to a couple of BMX magazines, into working as a TV show crew guy, sweating as a furniture mover, producing and editing a bunch of BMX and skateboard videos, and driving a taxi for years, among other things.  I feel now that my working life has come full circle.  I stumbled into writing with my first zine, in 1985, and soon worked at BMX Action and FREESTYLIN', and then for almost a year at the AFA newsletter.  I was just starting to think of myself as a writer then.  Then I went out into the world, wandering, for about 30 years.  I somehow came full circle, back to the San Fernando Valley, where I first started "getting serious" about writing, back in 1991.

Looking back now, from well into my fifth decade of life on Earth, that it couldn't have happened much differently.  Obscure little things that happened, and lessons learned at one weird job or another, made sense, or came into play, many years later.  While most people see me as a homeless loser who can't seem to get his shit together, it's much different from my point of view.  I've lived the last four years, through the whole pandemic, on the streets of L.A. county, mostly.  I live and sleep and wander alone, without a weapon.  My average night, with the multitude of "street zombies" shuffling by, tweekers, crackheads, and crazy motherfuckers of many varieties, my nights would scare the shit out of most people.  Yet I manage to get a reasonable night's sleep, all in all.

I wake up, get something to eat, and sit in the early morning light doing my own weird little meditation.  I once was a kid with a never ending string of fears running through my head.  I was afraid of everything.  Now I can empty my mind, for short periods, to a point of no thoughts at all, only sensations oozing through it, mostly traffic sounds.  I then pack up my stuff, go to my favorite fast food place, and suck down  some iced tea.  I never drank coffee, and recently gave up my long Diet Coke addiction.  Iced tea, usually with some lemonade, is my caffeine fix now.

Then I come here to the library, or some other place I can get online, and write.  I look up things that interest me.  I do some research along the way.  I write blog posts about things that I'm actually interested in.  And, I have some people read what I wrote, day after day after day.  My blogs have steady readers.  Not a huge amount, but some, day after day.  Later on I may draw for a while, or spend an hour or two reading.  This is what I love.  This is why I'm here.  I just don't make a living at it... yet.  

As hard as it is to imagine for most people, I didn't fuck up.  Every blog post I write, well over 2,500 of them now, is the result of of 57 years of wandering the physical world, the world of books, speeches and YouTube videos, and other content, and the world of thoughts and ideas.  57 years of this crazy path are behind every sentence I write, every picture I draw.  My life makes sense now, in a way it never did 35 years ago.  

And there's more to come.  Hopefully a lot more.  Time will tell.   


I've started a new blog, looking into ideas for side gigs, and small businesses.  Check it out.

As of late 2023, I'm doing most of my writing on Substack, a platform designed for writers.  Check it out: